I am Patrick. In daily life, I am independent, capable, and strong. I build, I plan, I create. I take care of others, I run things, I manage. That is the armour the world sees.
But my truth is different. Beneath that strength is a need to submit. To hand over control. To be taken, bound, and used without holding anything back, by someone who knows what to do with me.
I am not weak. I am not pretending. I am a man who longs to surrender every part of himself to someone who can take it.
To understand me, you need to understand what submission means to me.
This is not a role I play.
This is who I am.
Raw.
Honest.
Unmasked.
What Submission Means to Me
Submission is not a side of me I visit. It is my core. It is where I feel safe, where I feel connected, where I feel alive.
When I submit, it is not because I am beneath you. It is because I want you to see me. I want you to see what I am willing to give. My body. My voice. My pride. My orgasm. My obedience. My service.
It is not casual for me. It is not a game. It is a devotion. It is a truth. It is love expressed through obedience and care expressed through surrender.
When I submit, I want to feel your ownership in every corner of my life. I want rules. I want rituals. I want reminders that I am yours even when you are not in the room. I want to feel your words in my head when I wake. I want to ache for your use when you are away.
This is not a passing game. This is not fantasy. This is my sexuality. My identity. My rawest truth.
I have not always been able to live this part of myself outwardly, but it has never gone away. Kink is not something I discovered and then set aside. It has been my special interest for as long as I can remember, the thread running through my writing, my fantasies, and my sense of self. Even when life and relationships shifted, and active play was no longer possible, my submission stayed alive within me.
Now I am stepping into a new chapter. The circumstances of my life are changing, and with them comes the freedom to live my submission actively again. I return not as someone experimenting for the first time, but as someone who has studied, written, reflected, and carried this desire for years. I know who I am. I know what I need. And I am ready to give it, openly and without disguise.
Which is why I need someone real, someone I can give this to.
Photo taken July 2025
Why “Patrickhehim”
The name of this site comes from my pronouns. I am pansexual and I stand up for trans rights, as well as many other rights. Using he/him openly is my way of showing that support. It makes my identity clear, and it signals that I believe in equality, respect, and visibility. It is also the username I use across the internet. If you find me here or elsewhere, you are finding the same person. Honest, visible, and unmasked.
What I Am Looking For
I am looking for someone who enjoys control. Someone who knows their own mind and is not afraid to use it. Someone who wants more than a session. Someone who wants a real-life D/s relationship.
I crave teasing and training. I love daily rituals, clear rules, and firm expectations. I want the thrill of being used, pushed, punished, and exposed, but I also crave reciprocity. I want to give myself fully, but only to someone who treasures what I give. Control excites me most when it is held with care, when my devotion is met with attention, when my obedience is not taken for granted.
I want you to enjoy my vulnerability. I want you to take pleasure in my obedience. I want you to make me nervous, make me ache, make me desperate to please you.
I don’t want a fantasy for a night. I want something real. Control that lasts. A connection that locks me in forever.
I no longer confuse people pleasing with submission. I remain whole and independent, even as I give myself completely. I seek a reciprocal dynamic where control and care are shared.
What I Offer
When I give myself, I give completely. No holding back.
- I am steady, loyal, and patient.
- I am resourceful and creative. I bake, cook, and care for a home. Domestic service is not a chore for me; it is devotion and love in action.
- I am attentive. I notice. I anticipate. I respond.
- I bring a body that can be restrained, spanked, groped, and used.
- I bring a mind that thrives on structure, ritual, and obedience.
I will follow orders. I will cook for you, clean for you, serve you, and give myself in every way. Not out of weakness, but because I choose to. Because giving myself is where I feel most alive.
When I submit, I am not acting. I am giving you everything.
